The Eight: Reindeer Monologues

by Jeff Goode

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A dark, dark Christmas comedy. Scandal erupts at the North Pole when one of Santa's eight tiny reindeer accuses him of sexual harassment. As mass media descends upon the event, the other members of the sleigh team demand to share their perspectives, and a horrific tale of corruption and perversion emerges, which seems to implicate everyone from the littlest elf to the tainted Saint himself. With each deer's confession, the truth behind the shocking allegations becomes clearer and clearer. ...and murkier and murkier.

 

Are you looking for something different for Christmas this year? Tired of Christmas Carol and Gift of the Magi? Well, this is the script for you: eight reindeer dishing about the real Santa. All those rumors you've heard about him and the elves? About Rudolph's little secret? About Vixen's story that was leaked to the press? All true. Yes, the reindeer finally speak up and -- believe us -- they do not hold back!

 

(WARNING!! This show contains FOUL-MOUTHED REINDEER and very inappropriate ADULT HUMOR! Definitely no kids or anyone who doesn’t want to see the dark side of Santa Claus, Mrs. Claus and the North Pole!)

 

Character Breakdown (in order of appearance):

 

 

Age and race for all parts is flexible. Some roles may possibly be cross-gendered.

 

DASHER(M) - First Reindeer and leader of the pack each Christmas run. He refuses to speak on the scandal.

 

CUPID(M) - The only openly gay Reindeer, and extremely proud of it.

 

HOLLYWOOD(M) - Also known as PRANCER, his personality has changed some since the release of his movie and the launch of his acting career.

 

BLITZEN(F) - Vixen's chief supporter during the scandal and leader of the walk-out against Santa.

 

COMET(M) - A reformed convict, saved from a life of drugs and crime by the Claus family, he's Santa's biggest advocate and supporter.

 

DANCER(F) - Former ballet professional who joined The Eight not long after her studio was burned in protest of Reindeer dancers.

 

DONNER(M) - Rudolph's father and unemployed herd deer, he was placed on The Eight by Santa to help keep him quiet after the infamous "Foggy Christmas" incident.

 

VIXEN(F) - Attempting to press charges against Santa for sexual assault, her sordid past does not lend credibility to her accusations.

 

Age and race for all parts is flexible. Some roles may possibly be cross-gendered.